Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
