just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
