the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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