"it" just moved
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
