How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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