put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
