My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Randomize
