oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
