Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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