You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
