He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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