North Korea, Best Korea!
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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