She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
