I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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