I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize