I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
you win again, gameday.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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