Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
