oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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