For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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