never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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