he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
handjob tips. give me some.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
