Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
