Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
