I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Randomize
