Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
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