My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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