in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
being pregnant is like rehab
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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