Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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