you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Randomize