Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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