From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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