When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize