I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
