You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
