watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
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