Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
