What a fucking waste of an outfit
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
