My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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