You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize