Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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