I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
