I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize