just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
