honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
