all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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