and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Randomize
