very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize