i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Randomize
