Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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