i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
